Listen to the interview below (Part 1 and 2):
BBC presenter, Laura McIver interviewed me about The LOVE Project on the last day of 2025.
We had a lively conversation about The LOVE Project, the secret to enduring love, and how my mother’s remarkable love story inspired my book.
Here’s the transcript:
Laura McIver (Host): You’re tuned to BBC Radio Scotland Breakfast. It’s never too late to find love. That is the simple message behind a new book from the journalist Alison van Diggelen. The Love Project was inspired by the story of her 93-year-old mum who lives near Glasgow. A widow for more than two decades, she was in her late 80s when she fell hook, line, and sinker, learning to love again. Well, let’s talk to Alison now about her mum and others’ inspiring stories. Alison, good morning.
Alison van Diggelen: Good morning, Laura. Lovely to join you.
Laura: It’s lovely to have you on. Tell us more about your mum.
Alison: My mum is amazing. She’s a very sprightly 93-year-old, and she’d been a widow for 20 years and met this man at church. He is the organist at her local church. And they found love. He was a widower, and it’s just a lovely story. It brought a twinkle to my mum’s eyes and a spring in her step, even though she’s 93. They call themselves “special friends”—and they’ve been special friends for about four years now. It was lovely, and I happened to have been there and saw the spark being kindled.
Laura: Oh, it’s so sweet and lovely. Actually really reflective of my mum’s experience as well, because she as a widow—a younger widow—met her husband, George, at church as well. Because we always joke about the “Church of Scotland dating service…”
Alison: [Laughs]
Laura: …That is how they met. But it is interesting, as we get older, did it strike you that there are fewer opportunities, or maybe there are more to meet people when you’re retired?
Alison: Well,.. I talk about church being the Tinder for 80-year-olds, you know? It’s a lovely thing. And witnessing it as a daughter of a mother who’s been on her own for so long, it just brings me so much joy. Especially since I’m so far away—I’m talking to you from (Carmel) California, so I’m eight hours time difference and many thousands of miles away—but her story inspired me to write my first book and create ripples of love going around the world.
Laura: And you started to collect these other stories. How did you go about doing that, Alison?
Alison: So, as you mentioned earlier, I’m a journalist and I’ve contributed a lot to the BBC, interviewing some of the luminaries in Silicon Valley—Elon Musk (Meryl Streep, Richard Branson) and a lot of big names you’ll all have heard of in the tech world. I moved to Carmel in 2020 and, after seeing my mum transformed by love, I thought, “I bet there’s a few love stories in Carmel-by-the-Sea” ….this beautiful romantic place by the sea.
And so I just started interviewing people, and my neighbors, and then friends would recommend other people. And before I knew it, I had 30 real and sometimes gritty, and sometimes sad, but ultimately uplifting love stories. My book is called The Love Project—and I describe it as: Imagine Steinbeck’s Travels with Charley meets Eat, Pray, Love and Sex and the City. A little bit of everything.
Laura: A bit of everything in there. Well, give us some of your favorites.
Alison: So, one of them is a woman who posed nude for a world-famous photographer. Another is an American bagpiper who says piping is his way of fighting back against what he calls the “darkness of the world.” Another woman whose correspondence with a death row inmate leads to love and marriage while he’s still on death row. A gay man whose father throws him out of the house as a teenager. And a Scottish expat who lives here and carries a kilt—would you believe—in the boot of his car and he says, “Just in case.”
Laura: [Laughs]
Alison: So there’s humor and tears as well as love and pathos.
Laura: Were there any consistent themes, would you say, in these 30-odd stories?
Alison: Well, I asked several people who had had happy marriages. One of them was a 90-year-old man, a Hungarian immigrant here. And he’d had a very happy marriage of 60 years plus. Sadly his wife had died, but I said, “What is the secret to enduring love?” And he shared that with me. And would you like me to share it with you?
Laura: Please do!
Alison: Or do you want people to read the book?
Laura: No, please do share it.
Alison: So, he said: “Be in the moment.” And I think that’s a really important lesson for today. It’s so easy to be distracted by our phones and what’s going on on our social media, but just put down your phone and be in the moment and look into the eyes of your loved one. I think that’s a beautiful recipe. Another tip for enduring love was to consider every day as a potential date. And I loved that one too. There are so many… this book is full of lessons from other people’s stories. And my mum’s story is threaded through, as is my own. So…
Laura: And when you think about connection, how much do you think that has been changed by the internet, by technology? And the fact that that’s actually now how so many people do meet.
Alison: Yes. I mean, technology has good forces and bad forces, and it has allowed more people to connect. My daughter found the love of her life on Bumble, and she’s getting married next year, which is wonderful. But they’re very good about putting the tech aside, putting their phones away, going out for a meal or going out for an activity and leaving their phones at home. And I think that’s a lesson for all of us.
And I think it’s important to remember that people’s social media is often just the highlight reel, you know? That people are going through ups and downs. And my book does talk about the flip side of love and loss. There are four or five stories about grief and regret and how people have found purpose after losing a loved one, even losing a baby in one case.
Laura: Because there’s a bravery in that, isn’t there? In allowing yourself the vulnerability to love again, whether that is a partner or, as you say, the dreadful loss of a child or someone else really close to you.
Alison: Yes. And I have to applaud the bravery of everyone who shared their stories. These are 30 true love stories. And people cried with me and revisited difficult times in their lives. I felt truly honored that they shared their stories with me. And they all got to check the veracity and the details of their story before the book was published. But I’m absolutely thrilled with The Love Project. It’s actually sold out at our two local bookstores, independent bookstores here in Carmel. It’s resonating around the world. And I just couldn’t be more excited. I think people are famished for uplifting love stories right now.
Laura: I think you’re absolutely right. And what a lovely way to end the year, Alison, on that lovely note and the wisdom that comes with that message. Thank you so much. Lovely to talk to you and a very Happy New Year when it comes as well, Alison. That was Alison van Diggelen there, author of The Love Project.
80295 is our text this morning. Alison was talking about her mum who lives near Glasgow and found love late in life. I wonder if any of our listeners did the same? Let us know. We’d love to hear your stories. Nice uplifting stories to end the year. 80295 is our text number. It’s half past six.
[Short musical interlude. The transcript has been edited for length and clarity]